The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

Jumping On the Bed

Ya gotta love women~
A fifty-ish woman was at home, happily jumping on her bed and squealing with delight.

Her husband watched her for a while and asked, “Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look? What’s the matter with you?”

The woman continued to bounce on the bed and said, “I don’t care. I just came from having a mammogram and the doctor says I have the breasts of an 18 year-old”.

The husband said, “What did he say about your 56-year-old ass?”

“Your name never came up,” she replied.

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